Monday Mindset

Are you a victim or a victor? How do you think of yourself and how do you act? Victim mindset is an easy trap to fall into, but with focus, you can train your mind and your actions to break the thoughts that are holding you back.

I fell into temporary victim mindset last weekend. I found a house I really, really wanted. It had the perfect location, size, configuration, etc. I loved it and saw my imprint on it, with the Libby style throughout each room. I snooped it out the day it was listed, then went to the open house two days later. The problem was that by the open house there were already multiple offers and more were expected. I was paying cash and was not in a position to get into a bidding war and left the open house almost in tears as I felt like a loser. I felt like a complete failure because I could not have this house that I wanted. I moped around for the rest of the day, then got tired and bored with myself (IYKYK) and kicked back into Libby mode.

Sure, I did not get the house that I loved, but had to look at the reasons why. It needed work, as it is an estate, which could be a money pit. And I wanted to do some of the work myself, since I think I am a HGTV star, but I am still a bit burnt out by the duplex I renovated last year and don't really have the excitement to do so. Why did I not get this house? First, I did not put in a bid. I did nothing to put myself in a position to get the house. More broadly, it was not meant for me. I had to remind myself "this or something better". These are wise words from a very cherished person who routinely kicked me into gear in Washington DC. I had to remind myself to be grateful for what I do have and know that "what is meant for me will always be".

It is a mind shift that is necessary to break the victim cycle. Without it, you will fall into a lack mentality, always blaming others and focusing on the negative rather than focusing on yourself and what you have, can do, and really want. It takes mental training and practice to catch yourself and shift thoughts. And it is exhausting to do it, but once you are able to see that negative self talk only perpetuates being a loser, you will set yourself free.

One tool that is useful is the Emotional Guidance Scale from Abraham Hicks. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XaoQWcg0QhI )There are many versions and tutorials online to help you understand the scale and how to use it. If you want to discuss or need guidance, schedule a complementary call with me at https://calendly.com/libby-coaching. Take the first step.