You're Being Watched

Just a bit of paranoia for a rainy Friday, but what better way to start the weekend?! We are definitely being watched by technology, but this is more about how those around you are watching you, consciously or not. And they are watching you to see if you fit the role of leader and if you are someone with whom they want to work.

As a business owner, you are the center of your company. All eyes are upon you to see what you want, your mood, how you handle situations, how you spread praise, how you deal with problems, how you treat everybody/anybody, and so on. That is why business owners are always "on". It is quite stressful.

Even more interesting is that those watching you are not always doing it with awareness. They are just observing, logging, and setting an impression of what you are doing and who you are, from their perspective. The image is set consciously or subconsciously, but it is set and will resurface when your name is mentioned or you interact with these people. How many times have you thought that someone was aloof after one interaction, only to be surprised that they are actually friendly when you have a second interaction. You formed a quick opinion and stored it, and it appeared unknowingly, only to be changed.

This is daunting. No one wants to be under so much scrutiny and few of our lives can withstand constant scrutiny. I won't get into unseemly details, but imagine if you were on camera for the world to see, hear, and opine upon. That is probably why I am not a Real Housewife of Pittsburgh. I am too private.

When I owned my consulting firm, it took me too long to figure out that employees were always watching me. One time, my assistant said I was moody that week, so she stayed away from me. In my mind, I was not moody. I had too many deadlines and was focused. But to her, it was a sign to stay away. Another time, I felt sick around noon, but had an important meeting a few hours later and thought I could recover. I took a quick nap. Ken, an employee, who was generally disagreeable as a rule, slammed me because he decided that I was not sick and proceeded to disparage me. He was and is a jerk, so I did not give him credence and slammed him down, but his hateful image was set and that was that.

From then on, I made sure to present as a leader. To take decisive actions, greet everyone, get up and make small talk, check in on employees, and be genuinely pleasant. It took discipline and was hard when I was overly busy, but I had to be approachable and accessible so others could do their work and be their best.

By being purposeful in how I presented myself, I started turning heads. I was praised for how I handled situations where members of the public would start screaming at me and the panel I was facilitating or when a crazy person launched a defamatory internet campaign against me as a result of an action I took in representing a client. I was known to have grace under pressure and to be generally cool headed. Both were welcome impressions.

It is hard to be observed because we are all human. We err, we fail, we are not always our best. However, if you are aware that you are under scrutiny, you are able to think about how you present yourself and control the image a bit more. As a business owner, decide what image you want to portray. Take the steps daily to reinforce that image through your words and actions.

I'm watching all of you to see when you will take the first step and schedule a complementary call with me at https://calendly.com/libby-coaching or at [email protected]. Don't let me down.